Mother, I’m letting go.
It’s what you did a year ago
Now I know how, I swear
Walking so long in the dark, I arrived
To this now.
I don’t have to tell you
The forces that were my life,
You who could describe the moon
With so much care
And spoke everything – but not of your fear of dying
You knew why flowers grew on grass
To say, “I’m born”
Or that they might spring from crevices of rock to dance with the wind.
Sometimes your words split darkness the way you crack open a rock
Nothing diminished or unseen.
Like the time we described the good and happy life of a friend
And you said, “I know, I know, but he’s a hurt person.”
He’ll never know how you saw into him.
What Thoreau said he longed to do, you did –
Speak “first thoughts,”
While ours lay like cocoons spread in confusion
You never said the reasons for failure – why we get lost
Only that we are, and whether your thoughts spilled like butterflies into air
Or cut like an axe
You never lost the knowledge of center
That the failure to love ourselves deeply enough
Is more or less fatal
Well, the eventual is now
And I am broken like the moon,
Driftwood in the sea of my own drowning
Let me feel the attention you gave
To this world.
(Were you afraid of dying in case what came afterwards took less?)
With the same care you gave all along.
Safe with yourself.
I’m turning now to that shore.
Bits of this were bouncing around in my head as I watched this scene, but it took a happy accident yesterday for me to come across the complete poem. It feels presumptuous to think I know anything of what was going through Lynne’s mind that day on the anniversary of her mom’s passing, but I liked the spirit of this poem, anyway, and was very touched by Lynne’s trust in sharing some of her grief with us.
Hugs to you, Lynne.
Art, especially contemporary art, is not really my thing. It’s not ever felt accessible to me. It puzzles me, mostly, or makes me laugh sometimes, but I’ve always felt that I’m somehow missing the point.
Save for a few pleasant experiences in Spain, sculpture displayed in stuffy museums or galleries doesn’t interest me. Set that artwork against a backdrop of autumn’s finest colors and well… I’m there!
I took advantage of the day off, overpaid government employee that I am, and, after doing my civic duty, visited the Grounds For Sculpture in Hamilton. It was a perfect day for a stroll through the grounds to enjoy what is also a fine garden and arboretum. The fall colors were gorgeous.
Here’s some favorite views:
This made me smile!
October Gathering by Joan Danziger… I really liked this one, though the scale was tiny compared to many of the others.
Gorgeous colors in the background here…
On Poppied Hill by Seward Johnson
Lintel by Emilie Benes Brzezinski
More pics to come…
I nearly missed him standing there beside the dogwood, but he spotted me quickly once I stepped outside with the camera. In case you’re squinting at the fuzzy focus (what’s new?) I counted six points on this buck… a trophy to some, I’d guess.
I followed him through my little woodland garden of mountain laurels and viburnum, trying to get close enough for a halfway decent pic, but he spooked and was off with a snort and a flash of his white tail to the park out back where he makes his living. Usually I see him there at night on walks with Luka, one shape among many in the moonlight, disappearing into the shadows.
Look who dropped in among the newly arrived Brant… Buffleheads! Can Hoodies be far behind?
A chilly wind floats a Harrier above the scarlet hues of poison ivy at Plum Island on Sandy Hook… and I’m imagining Short-ears at dusk.
Anyone else looking forward to winter birds? Which ones?
It’s been a busy couple of days here that involved lots of picture-taking…
Thursday there was a retirement party for my boss, whom we thoroughly embarrassed for his 38 years of service with a cape and a crown and plenty of mostly-good-natured roasting… He’s worked at social services for as long as I’ve been alive. Jeez.
Nice was the time to chat with coworkers without the pressures of ringing phones. This is my friend Anne who works in personnel and makes sure we all get paid on time and Cathy, one of my favorite people in the whole world; she and I used to work together, then she got promoted and I got promoted and now we don’t see much of each other anymore.
My buddy Pete and I; we’re neighbors and got to work together for a short time last summer while I was assigned to the homeless services unit. He was transferred to my building recently, so I stop by his desk a couple times a week to talk birds and photography.
On Halloween morning, there was a parade of trick-or-treaters through the office. Click for a peek at the Christmas tree costume – I love it! Note person at desk in background actually trying to work…
I had to bribe him for it, but Luka will do most anything for a Haloween treat!
Finally, last night, there was a nephew’s wedding to photograph. My camera needs a few days off, I think.
Now to catch up with comments and all of your blogs…